Child's Play

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"This is boring." moaned Chuckie after lighting another smoke bomb.

"Well what would you suggest we do?" inquired Marty. At age eleven, his three younger brothers often expected him to keep them entertained.

"We could ride our bikes to the store and buy some candy," Chuckie suggested.

"I'm broke. All my money went for the smoke bombs," Marty replied sadly.

"Besides, Linda told us not to leave the driveway," added seven-year-old Larry.

The boys sat back against the brick wall of the house in deep silence.

"Hey, did you hear Linda telling mommy about that guy she knows?" asked Chuckie.

"Oh, you mean the firemen guy? Yeah...I heard her saying something about him. Why?" Marty inquire suspiciously.

"It's just that Linda said that she was glad she moved back here because now she'd be closer to her friend--- the 'sexy fireman.'" stated Chuckie.

"Chuckie you're up to something. What is it?" pressed Marty.

"Well I have an idea..." started Chuckie.

"Uh oh!" groaned Larry.

"Let me finish, will ya? I heard Linda say she wanted to see this guy, but was too shy to call him... So why don't we get the fireman to come here?" finished Chuckie.

"I don't think Linda's going to like us arranging dates for her." stated Larry matter of factly.

"It's not a date! We're just going to get him here. Look, from what I heard, Linda REALLY likes this guy," Chuckie stated emphaticlly.

"Okay so what's your big plan?" asked Marty.

"We start a fire...well not a real one." Chuckie eyed up Marty's smoke bombs. "Yeah...we use the smoke bombs!"

"Even if we used 'em all there won't be enough smoke to call the fire department," Marty pointed out.

"Hey how about some leaves!" added Larry as he pointed to the leaf covered garage floor.

"Yeah! That'll work!" Chuckie said enthusiasticlly. "Come on!" He jumped up from his sitting position.

"You sure about this?" Marty asked with trepidation.

"Of course, I'm sure. I heard everything! Linda told mommy that she thought this guy was really cute and she used the word "sexy" a lot!"

"So what do we do when they get here? Yell "sexy firemen" at them?"
Marty asked sarcasticlly.

"Sure. Why not? It's a code I heard mommy and Linda use when they talk about this guy." offered Larrry.

"SEXY FIREMEN!" shouted Andy flashing a cute smile. The three older boys all laughed.

"Shhhhhh!" Marty said as he put his finger to his lips "The sexy firemen are a surprise for Linda."

"Come on let's get to work," urged Chuckie.

The four boys ran up the driveway and into the garage.
………………………………………..`

The men of station 51 were gathered in the engine bay receiving their morning assignments from Captain Stanley. "Stoker check the air tanks and the pumps. Marco, you and Chet work on the hoses, Johnny and Roy check your stuff and then help with the hoses. Any questions?"

The men all mumbled their responses and broke up to do their assigned tasks. Captain Stanley headed back towards his office. Roy opened the back panel on the squad.

"I'll do the trauma box if you do the drug box," he said.

"Deal," Johnny replied.

Just as Johnny reached for the drug box the tones sound. Roy shoved the trauma box back in and slammed the door.

"Station 51, garage fire, 1371 Sunnydale Rd. One...three...seven...one Sunnydale Rd. Cross street Midway, time out: 15:45."

"Station 51, KMG365," acknowledged Captain Stanley,

He handed the address off to Roy who passed if to Johnny. Johnny wrote the address in the log book as the squad as the engine left the station.
…………………………………………..

The engine and squad pulled up in front of a two story brick house with a detached garage. Four boys ranging in age from 3-11 years old came running out of the house.

"SEXY FIREMAN!!!!!!" They shouted in unison as they swarmed around the engine and squad.

Smoke billowed from the garage. Also flames could be seen in the middle of the floor. Linda Halloran, the home owner, emerged from the garage with a garden hose.

Captain Stanley directed his men, "Chet get the reel line!"

Chet did as directed and began to put the fire out. Linda went over to the Captain.

"Boy, you guys are fast. My neighbor just called you a few minutes ago," she said.

Johnny and Roy joined the captain with the boys in tow. Johnny was surprised when he saw Linda, and a whole range of emotions played across his face.

"Linda, are you all right?!" he asked worriedly.

Linda turned to look at Johnny. She too is shocked and surprised.

"Johnny?! What are you doing here?"

"I was just about to ask you the same thing. I thought you moved East?"

"I did, but I missed the ocean and the sun."

Roy interrupted, "Uh...I hate to break up your reunion here, but is everything okay?"

"Oh, we're okay," replied Linda. "My garage is another story." She cast a heart-sick look at the now smoldering mess in the middle of the floor.

"That's because Chuckie wanted to start a fire!" stated Marty, the
oldest boy.

"I did not!!!" replied Chuckie, the next oldest boy. "You were the one with the smoke bombs and the matches!"

"Yeah and you wasted all my smoke bombs, you idiot!"

"I'm NOT an idiot , you twerp!!!" countered Chuckie.

"Shut up, jerk!" Marty exclaimed as he hit Chuckie.

"You shut up, creep!" Chuckie responded, hitting Marty back.

" I saw him!" stated Larry, the next to youngest child. "Chuckie took the matches and started the fire."

"You're a liar! Tell the truth!" yelled Chuckie, shoving Larry in the process.

"Stop pushing me!" Larry countered, pushing Chuckie back. Marty hit Chuckie on the back of his head with his hand.

"Ow! Quit touching me!" Chuckie screamed as he kicked Marty.

Johnny and Linda sprang into action and broke up the fight as Roy calmly watched.

"Hey, if you don't stop shoving each other, I'm gonna shove you!" warned Johnny as he grabbed Larry by the collar.

"Boys, stop it!!" Linda yelled as she pried Marty and Chuckie apart. "Get in the house NOW!!" She shoved the boys toward the front door. "And take little Andy with you!" she called after them.

Johnny looked at her with a questioning expression. "I know it's been awhile, but where did you get those kids?"

Linda laughed. "Oh, those little monkees aren't mine. I'm babysitting for a friend of mine while she has surgery."

"What about their dad?" asked Roy. "Can't he take 'em?"

"He won't take 'em. So it was either me or Social Services."

"Looks like you got the short end of the stick," Johnny replied with a smirk on his face.

Captain Stanley, Marco and Chet were busy cleaning up the pile of wet leaves and smoke bombs from the garage. That left Mike Stoker alone and unarmed at the engine. He did not see the two older boys sneaking into the cab of the vehicle while the two younger boys snuck into the the squad. Suddenly the air was filled with the sound of sirens and air horns, and the sight of flashing lights.

The adults all took off running toward the vehicles. Stoker was trying to get Chuckie out of the driver's seat with no luck. Johnny, Roy and Linda headed for the squad while the captain, Chet and Marco tackled the engine. The four boys managed to lead the adults on a Marx Brothers style chase over, under and through the vehicles. Marty and
Chuckie threw hoses at the fire fighters and used the ladders as homemade monkey bars. Larry and Andy climbed out the squad windows and scampered over the roof, down the through the back and disappeared underneath the vehicle. While the adults were busy running around and around the squad, the boys managed to escape and climb back into the squad through the windows.

Larry picked up the microphone to the radio and said, "Breaker! Breaker! This here is Little Red Fire Truck calling all trucks!"

"I want to drive!" Andy screamed as he tried to push Larry out of the driver's seat.

"Hey, any of you good buddies got your ears on out there? I've got smokies crawling all over me and I need a hand!" Larry reported into the microphone.

"10-4 Little Red Fire Truck," replied Chuckie from the engine's radio. "I'm on a two lane blacktop headed your way!" He pulled the air horn string a couple of times. Roy yanked open the driver's side door as Johnny and Linda surrounded the
passenger side. Roy reached in and shut off the lights and sirens. He then grabbed Larry by the arm and pulled him out of the cab.

"Get out here! And stay off the radio!" he ordered.

Johnny opened his door and dragged Andy out of the vehicle.

"I wanna drive!" the child screamed as Johnny handed him to Linda.

"Yeah...well I've been saying that for six years and it ain't happened yet. So don't bet on it kid," he responded dryly.

The radio crackled to life, "This is LA County. Will the unauthorized user please identify?"

Johnny grabbed the mic from the seat, "LA, this is squad 51, please disregard that last transmission. Our wires got crossed."

"10-4, squad 51."

Johnny glared at Larry who had been deposited next to Linda.

"You touch that radio again and I'll break your hand," he threatened. Larry moved closer to Linda. Just then Marty and Chuckie came running over and hid behind Linda in fear.

"Save us, Linda!" Marty panted.

"That guy wants to chop us up with an axe!" exclaimed Chuckie fearfully pointing at Chet who was approaching the group with a maniacal look on his face.

"And I should stop him because....?" she retorted.

"Our mom would miss us," Chuckie answered.

"No she wouldn't," Linda stated matter-of-factly. "Now get in the house before I decide to let Axe Man have a whack or two at you!" she ordered.

The four boys took off running as fast as they could. Linda turned to face an angry, tired mob of firemen. She was deeply embarrassed.

"Fellas...I'm REALLY sorry about all this," she apologized.

"Yeah...well we better make ourselves available," Captain Stanley responded as he made a hasty retreat to the engine.

"Big, brave firemen!" teased Linda. "What's the matter, you scared of four little boys?"

"Man, Linda, your stone cold crazy for dealing with these kids," Johnny replied.

"Oh, they're no worse than we were when we were little," she laughed.

"WE!" Johnny exclaimed. "Oh, no! Don't lump me in with YOU! I'm not the one who put the smoke bomb in the girl's room!" he reminded her.

"Maybe not, but YOU gave me the smoke bomb!" Linda laughed.

Johnny ducked his head in embarrassment the retreated to the safety of the squad.

"Well, we should go," Johnny said impatiently.

"Hey! Give me a call okay? I'm in the book"

"Yeah. I will," Johnny looked at Linda and smiled. "It's really nice having you back. Don't be a stranger, okay?"

"I won't," she replied.

Linda waved as the squad pulled out onto the road. The boys came out of the house and waved at the truck also.

"So is that the guy you were telling mommy about?" Marty asked innocently.

"Who?" Linda asked absently.

"Johnny, that's who," Marty replied.

"I heard you tell mommy that you always thought he was sexy even in school when you were a kid my age," Larry added.

"He's kinda skinny, ain't he?" Chuckie asked. "I always thought firemen were like wrestlers. You know...big"

"Linda likes Johnny?" Andy questioned.

"Yeah, Linda likes Johnny," answered Chuckie. "She finds tall, skinny Johnny sexy."

Linda looked at the boys in utter shock and embarrassment.

"Guys, that's enough! Johnny is just a FRIEND! A very good friend. Nothing more. Besides, we have more important things to discuss."

"Like what?" Marty asked.

"Like who is going to clean up the mess in my garage!" she retorted.

"Not me! I didn't start the fire," Marty answered.

Well neither did I!" Chuckie said defensively. "So count me out!"

"I'm not doing it if they're aren't doing it," added Larry.

Linda looked at Andy with a comical expression on her face, "Well Andy, do you want to voice your opinion on this matter?"

Andy was busy chasing a butterfly across the yard.

"I don't think so. Okay...," she looked at the boys with a no nonsense expression, "there were three boys in the garage when the fire started, so the three boys should have to clean up."

"But I didn't do anything!" Chuckie whined.

"Yeah...I know. You're always so innocent, Chuckie," Linda replied sarcastically. "NOW MOVE!"

The boys all grumbled as she shoved them toward the garage. Andy gave up on the butterfly and followed them.

"Wait for me!" he yelled.
………………………………………………

Johnny went dancing into the community room the next day. He was whistling a happy tune as he headed for the coffee pot.

"Good morning guys!" he cheerily replied.

All eyes turn toward him in shocked surprise.

"If Gage is THIS happy this early in the morning then he must've scored with a beautiful chick," Chet commented.

Johnny poured himself a cup of coffee and took a sip. He leaned against the sink and just smirked. Even Roy became curious.

"Well?" Roy asked.

"Yeah, Pal, give us all the juicy details," coaxed Captain Stanley.

"Make us old married men jealous," added Mike Stoker.

"Come on, Johnny, the suspense is killing us," chimed in Marco.

"I'll bet he was with that new nurse from Rampart," Chet said. "So who was it Gage?"

Johnny flashed a wry grin and said, "I'll never tell."

The tones went off and everyone jumped up.

"Engine 51, trash fire, 1210 Monroe St. One...two...one...zero Monroe St. Cross Street, Baker. Time out, 8:10."

The engine crew left as Roy sat back down at the table. Johnny sat down next to him.

"Okay Johnny, what gives?" Roy asked.

"I called Linda last night," he said as he started to shovel a cookie into his mouth.

"Okay...," Roy said hesitantly and looked at Johnny for help.

"And we talked," he said between bites.

"I'm confused," Roy said dryly. "You just TALKED and you're dancing around here like you hit a home run?"

Now it was Johnny's turn to be confused as he stared at Roy.

"Roy, you really need to work on your metaphors."

"And you need to work on your communication skills. Speak English, will ya! Why are you so happy after just TALKING with a girl?"

Johnny sighed and sat forward with his elbows on the table.

"It's hard to explain, but seeing Linda again was really hard, you know? It brought up all those memories of Don...," a sad look crossed his face.

Roy remembered the night Don Halloran died. Johnny took his friend's death very hard and it was painful for Roy to watch his partner work through his grief. Linda was Don's daughter and Johnny's best friend from childhood. Don's death had brought the two closer together, but Roy could see that seeing her yesterday had reminded him of that awful
night. Johnny and Linda's friendship had been built on the sweet innocence of youth, but now it had matured into one filled with bittersweet happiness. Roy did not have any words to offer his friend so he remained silent.

"I really wasn't sure if I should call her," Johnny continued. "Or even if I wanted to. But I'm glad I did. We talked about old times and we even talked about Don. Man, it was great!" His face lit up in a big, happy grin.

Roy smiled with relief that things had worked out well.

"So are you gonna stop by to see her or are all of your conversations going to take place over the phone?" Roy asked as he sipped his coffee.

"We've decided to get together AFTER those four rugrats go home," Johnny replied.

Roy chuckled. "Good idea. You know, Linda must be crazy to take on those kids."

"Man, she was ALWAYS like that! Kids and animals. This chick attracts 'em like a magnet. If it's a stray, Linda picks it up. Some people find that a turn off," Johnny commented with an air of authority.

Roy looked at his partner knowingly and replied smiling, "not you though."

"Hey, anybody who likes kids and animals is MY kind of person," Johnny said honestly.

"Well I hope we never have to see THOSE kids again," Roy replied matter-of-factly.

The tones sounded.

"Squad 51, child injured, 1371 Sunnydale Rd. One...three...seven...one Sunnydale Rd, cross street Midway. Time out, 8:20."

"Guess what," Johnny said dryly.

"Yeah, I know.... roll up the windows and lock the doors when we get there," Roy groaned as he followed Johnny out to the engine bay.
…………………………………………….

When the squad pulled up in front of Linda's house, the guys were greeted by Marty, Chuckie and Andy.

"SEXY FIREMAN!!!" the boys shouted in unison as they crowded around the passenger side door. Johnny and Roy rolled up the windows and locked the doors as they exited the vehicle.

Linda was sitting in the middle of the yard cradling a hysterical Larry in her arms.

"Where's the big truck?" Andy asked.

"There ain't no fire you dummy so they didn't send the truck," sneered Marty.

Johnny and Roy grabbed the Trauma box and the Drug box from the squad, making sure to lock the doors when they were done.

"What's that stuff for?" Chuckie inquired as the boys followed the paramedics across the yard.

"Stuff we need to do our jobs," Johnny answered.

They reached Linda and Larry. Johnny knelt down next to Linda on the right side and Roy knelt down next to Linda on the left side. Johnny looked at Linda with concern on his face.

"What happened here," he asked.

Linda looked at him with a weary expression. "I don't know. The boys were out here playing while I did some ousework. The next thing I know, Larry's out here screaming."

"I know what happened," Marty offered.

The adults turned their attention to him.

"Chuckie and Larry got into a fight and Chuckie hit Larry in the head with a rock," finished Marty.

"I did not, you liar!" Chuckie countered hotly. "Andy threw the rock!"

"Yeah, right!" Marty exclaimed sarcastically. "Like a three-year-old could throw a rock that hard. I saw you!"

"NOBODY should be throwing rocks," Roy stated firmly. "It's dangerous."

Johnny glared at Chuckie for a moment. The boy ignored everyone and muttered under his breath. Johnny turned his attention back to Larry.

"Larry, let me see your face," he requested calmly.

Linda moved her arms so Johnny could get a clear view of the boy.

Johnny examined the lump forming on the boy's head. Roy looked over Linda's shoulder.

"What do you think?" Roy asked.

Johnny took out his penlight and checked Larry's eyes.

"Pupils are equal and reactive," Johnny said as he was taking the boy's pulse. Larry continued to cry hysterically.

"Oh, he's overreacting as usual," Marty muttered in annoyance. "I wiped out on my bike once and scraped my head worse than that and I didn't cry!"

Linda looked at him incredulously. "Oh yes you did! I was there, remember?"

Marty lowered his eyes as he thought. "Oh yeah. Well...at least I didn't cry THAT much. Larry's a big baby, that's all!"

"He's seven! Leave him alone!" Linda admonished. "Why don't you and Chuckie go sit on the front porch and take Andy with you."

"I don't want to sit down!" Chuckie whined. "I want to stay here with Lover Boy Johnny!"

Johnny looked at Linda with a surprised look on his face. Roy smirked in the background trying not to burst our laughing. Linda turned red in the face and smiled weakly.

"Kids," she said totally flustered. "I blame TV for the decline of childhood in these modern times."

Johnny went back to tending to Larry. "He's got a bump on his forehead with a small cut in it. Pulse is regular and strong. I think he'll be okay, but maybe we should have the doctors at Rampart take a look at him."

"Larry gotta go to the hospital?" Andy asked.

I'll be okay. Really," Larry exclaimed. "It's not that bad." His crying started to subside. Johnny cleaned the wound and put a bandage on it.

"You sure you don't want to go?" he asked the boy. Larry shook his head. Johnny looked at Linda and said, "Okay...well, put some ice on it and keep an eye on him. If he starts acting strangely take him to the Emergency Room."

"How would I know if HE was acting strange?" she asked sarcastically.

Both Johnny and Roy started to laugh.

"Okay... well, if he starts acting NORMAL take him to the Emergency Room," Roy replied.

"If I took any of these boys to the hospital because they acted NORMAL, their mother would never forgive me," Linda said jokingly.

Johnny and Roy burst out laughing again. A few feet behind them an all out war broke out between Marty and Chuckie. Andy ran over to the adults.

"Chuckie's throwing rocks at Marty," he told them. Larry got off Linda's lap as she stood. Johnny and Roy turned to look at the boys. They saw Chuckie miss when he threw a rock at Marty.

"Larry, go in the house with Andy," Linda instructed.

Larry grabbed Andy's hand and headed for the house. Johnny looked at Linda with a cold, detached expression.

"Their listening skills need A LOT of work," he said wryly.

"Hey... be my guest," Linda waved her arm in the direction of the combatants.

Johnny pulled himself to his full height and strutted purposefully over to the brawling boys. He grabbed Chuckie by the collar and pulled him away from Marty.

"Jerk!" Marty shouted.

"Creep!" Chuckie retorted.

"HEY!!! That's enough!" Johnny yelled. He looked at Marty and asked gently, "are you okay?"

"Yeah," Marty answered.

"Good. Go in the house," Johnny ordered. Marty walked toward the house muttering under his breath as Roy and Linda watched in amusement.

"Didn't we just tell you NOT to throw rocks?!" Johnny inquired angrily.

"I didn't throw any rocks!" Chuckie retorted.

"Yes you did! I saw you." Johnny bent over so that he was eye to eye with Chuckie. The boy did not look at him. Johnny grabbed the boy's shirt and tugged on it roughly and said, "hey, Chuckie, listen to me. If you ever throw another rock at anyone again I'll personally break your arm. Do you understand me?" Johnny's voice conveyed controlled anger as he tugged on the boy's shirt again.

"Yeah," Chuckie muttered sarcastically.

"Chuckie that is not how you answer an adult," Linda admonished as she approached, glaring at the boy. "Look at him and answer properly," she ordered.

Chuckie turned and looked at Johnny with cold, narrowed eyes. "Yes sir. I understand," he answered with no emotion.
Johnny let go of him.

"Oh, and by the way young man, I'll help him break your arm if you ever do that again," Linda added firmly.

Chuckie looked at her and realized that she wasn't kidding.

"Now get in the house," Linda ordered.

Chuckie ran toward the house. Roy came over to Linda and Johnny.

"How long will that last?" he asked.

"Oh...about three minutes if I know Chuckie," Linda answered.

"You need a whip and a chair for this group," quipped Johnny.

I've considered locking them in the basement until they're 18 or their mother comes home... whichever comes first," she replied as she walked the two paramedics to the squad. Roy and Johnny unlocked the doors in the back and stowed away their gear.

"Maybe we could get Rampart to authorize some heavy drugs for them," Johnny joked.

"Oh, could you?" Linda asked feigning a hopeful tone as Johnny laughed.

I'll call you tonight and we'll discuss it," Johnny replied.

"By then I'LL need those drugs!" Linda exclaimed wearily.

Johnny put his hand on her shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze.

"You're doing just fine," he said sweetly.

"Thanks. I'll talk to you later." Linda turned and headed toward the house as Johnny and Roy unlocked the doors and got into the squad.

Roy picked up the microphone and reported, "Squad 51, available." He replaced the mike and looked at Johnny. "You want to bet we'll be back again REAL soon?"

Johnny leaned back wearily in his seat. He wiped his hand across his face and replied, "I don't want to think about it."

"That Chuckie has me worried. He doesn't seem to have a conscience," Roy remarked.

"Yeah. I know," Johnny agreed as he glanced out the window at the house. "That concerns me too."

Roy started the engine and pulled the squad out onto the road.
…………………………………………..

The next morning Roy strolled into the engine bay and found Johnny checking the supplies. The engine was out on a run.

"Well, how was your night?" Roy asked.

"Not bad." Johnny put the supplies back in the Trauma Box. "We need to make a supply run to Rampart."

"Okay. After we have some coffee," Roy responded as he headed toward the kitchen as Johnny put the Trauma Box away.

The tones sounded.

"Squad 51, woman injured. 1371 Sunnydale Rd..."

Roy and Johnny looked at each other with the same goofy look on their faces.

"Why doesn't Linda just move into the station? It would save a lot of wear and tear on the squad," Roy remarked sarcastically.

Johnny shook his head in disbelief and snorted loudly. They got into the squad and Johnny acknowledged the call, "LA, squad 51, KMG365."

"Should I write down the address for you?" quipped Roy.

Johnny glared at him and retorted, "Oh, you're a riot, you are!
Just drive, will ya?"

Roy had a funny little smirk on his face as he pulled out into traffic. Johnny concentrated on writing the address down in the log book.
……………………………………..

This time when the squad pulled up in front of the house only the four boys were out front. When they saw the squad they all start to yell and scream, "SEXY FIREMAN!!!!"

Johnny and Roy looked at each other questioningly.

"Why do they say that everytime they see us?" Roy asked Johnny totally bewildered.

"Who knows. Maybe it's a new fan club," Johnny quipped.

"Maybe YOUR fan club, Junior... not mine," Roy retorted.

Johnny looked blankly at Roy before he got out of the squad. Remembering their previous visits, they made sure the windows were up and the doors were locked.

"Where's Linda?" More importantly, WHAT have you done to her?" Johnny asked Chuckie as he gave the boy a suspicious look.

"We didn't do anything. She's under the sink," Larry answered.

"She's out cold and her hand is bleeding," Marty informed Roy as he dragged out the drug box and biophone. Johnny grabbed the Trauma Box. They shut the doors to the equipment compartment and started to walk across the yard with the boys getting in their way.

"Can I help carry something?" Chuckie asked as he made a grab for the Trauma Box.

"No. I've got it," Johnny replied as he pulled the box away from Chuckie.

"I can help carry something," Marty offered and he reached for the phone.

Roy lifted the biophone in the air to keep Marty from touching it.

"That's alright, I can handle it," he answered.

"I want to help!" Andy squeeled.

"Hey Johnny, guess what!" Chuckie said excitedly.

"What?" Johnny asked.

"Guess what Linda told my mom about you last night on the phone when they talked!" Chuckie teased.

"Shut up, you moron!" Marty yelled as he slapped Chuckie upside the head. "You're not supposed to listen in on other people's conversations! Besides, if you say anything Linda's gonna be real mad."

"Don't hit me, dirtball!" Chuckie yelled as he shoved Marty.

"Get off me, you slimeball!" Marty bellowed as he kicked Chuckie. He missed and kicked Larry instead.

"OW!!!" Larry screamed as he charged after Marty, kicking him in the backside.

The three older boys ended up in a kicking and screaming match with Andy being the odd man out.

"Do I have to make you stop?!" Andy threatened in the most authoritative voice his three year old body could muster.

Johnny and Roy looked at each other and rolled their eyes. Johnny shoved the noisy group through the front door. The sound level escalated as they entered the house.

"Where's Linda?" Johnny shouted above the noise.

"There!" Marty pointed to the sink.

Linda was half under the sink and she was slowly regaining consciousness. Johnny went over to her and knelt down. He took off his helmet and peered under the sink at her.

"So... we meet again," she said groggily as she rubbed her head and groaned.

"Most people use an oven when they try to kill themselves. This is my first suicide attempt by plumbing!" Johnny teased as he flashed his crooked grin.

Linda rolled her eyes and groaned at his bad joke as she struggled to sit up.

"As a comedian, you make a better paramedic," she retorted.

Johnny and Roy helped her up off the floor and into a chair. Chuckie came over and tapped Johnny on the shoulder as Johnny was examining Linda's hand.

"Chuckie, leave Johnny alone and go outside," Linda requested weakly.

"But I need to tell him something," Chuckie replied.

Marty and Larry played in the Trauma Box with Andy's help. Johnny turned around to get something from the box and saw the mess the boys had made.

"Hey! Get out of there!" he yelled as he swatted at the boys. Marty, Larry and Andy ducked out of the way. "Leave that stuff alone!"

"Boys, go outside!" Linda shouted wearily.

Johnny picked up some antiseptic and some gauze. He began cleaning the blood off of Linda's hand while Roy took her pulse.

"Johnny, I've got something REAL important to tell you!" Chuckie whined.

"Okay." He turned to look at Chuckie. "What?" he asked slightly annoyed.

Chuckie leaned close to Johnny and whispered in his ear. Linda became concerned when she saw Johnny turn six shades of red.

"Hey!! What are you telling him?" she demanded to know. Chuckie straightened up and Johnny turned to give Linda a sly look. "Chuckie, what did you tell him?" she demanded again. Chuckie just wiggled his eyebrows up and down with a mischievous grin on his face as he sauntered out of the room. Linda looked at Johnny totally confused. "Tell me what he said." she implored.

"Let’s just say I know why they yell "Sexy Firemen" every time they see us." he responded in a conspiratorial tone. Linda leaned back and groaned.

A loud bang interrupted them along with screaming and the plaintive plea of an angry toddler.

"Give me my hat!" Andy screamed as he tried to get Johnny’s helmet off of Marty. "Give me my hat!"

The fight at the front door escalated as Chuckie tried to put the chain on while Larry was still halfway wedged in the door.

Johnny, Roy and Linda all looked at each other and rolled their eyes helplessly. The four boys came running into the kitchen. They chased each other around the table getting in everyone’s way and virtually destroying the place. Marty and Chuckie played catch with the helmet, Larry grabbed a meat tenderizer from the drawer and tried to attack Chuckie with it. Andy was becoming angrier and louder.

"I WANT MY HAT!!!!!" Andy screamed in the most annoying toddler voice anyone had ever heard.

"Hey! Stop!" he yelled. He caught his helmet in mid air between Chuckie and Marty. "Give me that!"

"Hey, you…kid with the meat tenderizer…give me that thing now!" he ordered as he reached for Larry.

Johnny glared at Larry angrily as he watched the boy run around to the back of the table. Seeing the boy cornered between the table , his fighting brothers and Roy, Johnny made his move. He lunged for Larry, catching him just as he tried to jump on Roy’s back. He roughly grabbed the weapon from the child’s hand.

"Don’t mess with me kid. I’m bigger, longer, stronger and quicker than you." Johnny growled.

Larry quickly joined his brothers in the punching and kicking battle that they had started. Johnny felt his helmet pulled from his hand and turned to see Andy heading down the hallway wearing it like a prize.

"Yeah. Go kill each other outside." Johnny chimed in as he pushed the boys out the back door. As Johnny started back toward Linda his helmet came flying down the hallway landing at his feet. Andy could be heard screaming outside. Johnny shook his head in despair as he looked at Linda. "Are you sure their mother wasn’t admitted to the psyche unit at Rampart?" he questioned. Linda laughed slightly as Johnny knelt down and checked her eyes. "So, do you want to tell me what you were doing under the sink or do I have to guess?" he asked as he worked.

"Andy dropped something down the drain and I was trying to take it apart. I cut my hand on a piece of metal and when I sat up I hit my head." she told him.

"Well it looks like you’ll live, but you need a tetanus shot. We’d like to take you to Rampart and have the doctors there look at you." advised Roy.

Linda looked at him as if he had lost his mind. "Roy, are you crazy?!" she exclaimed. "I can’t take those kids in and ambulance!"

Now Linda looked at him as if he had lost his mind too. "Are you volunteering to babysit them while I get checked out?" she asked in amazement.

"Sure. They’ll probably be better behaved in public than they are at home." Johnny answered flippantly as he gave her what he hoped was reassuring smile. Linda just sat there and shrugged her shoulders, but did not say a word. Roy called Rampart on the biophone to inform them about their current situation while Johnny finished dressing Linda’s hand.

Linda nervously kicked her feet against the exam table as Dr. Early examined her eyes and the bruise on her forehead. Roy hung out in the background as the nurse prepared the tetanus shot.

"Everything looks okay." the doctor advised as he stepped away from the table. The nurse came forward with the needle as Linda glanced between it and Dr. Early. "You look nervous. Don’t worry, a tetanus shot doesn’t hurt." Dr. Early assured her.

Dr. Early was still trying to figure out if he should push the issue when Johnny came bursting through the exam room door gasping for breath. Johnny’s hair was a mess and his uniform was untucked with stains dotting the front.

"What happened to you?" Roy exclaimed as he stood up straight and looked at Johnny with concern.

Johnny’s eyes darted from Roy to Linda to Dr. Early and back again. "Those KIDS!" he sputtered.

"Oh…let’s see…" he said as he paced across the room with a noticeable limp towards Roy. "First, there was the food fight in the cafeteria…then Marty tried to steal a candy bar from the gift shop…Johnny headed in Linda’s direction. "Andy wandered outside into the parking lot with a pair of hot sunglasses requiring an all out search. Then, we tried to see their mother." Johnny stopped in front of Linda and leaned his hands on the table until his face was only inches away from hers. "Did you know your friend has a written order that she is to have no visitors?!" he exclaimed hotly. "She claimed she doesn’t HAVE any children and I don’t blame her!" Linda tried to stifle a giggle. She and Charlotte had joked about this before the surgery, but she never thought it would really come to pass. Johnny caught the goofy look on her face. "Ohyeah!" It’s REAL funny!" he sputtered angrily as she tried to choke back the laughter that was welling up inside her.

"Well hop up there and Let me take a look at it." the doctor instructed. Johnny hoped up on the table next to Linda and rolled up his right pant leg as Roy moved in to get a closer look as Dr. Early examined his partner.

"Good for ya." Johnny told her coldly as he gave her a nasty look. "OW!" he cried as the doctor touched his bruise leg.

"Serves you right!" Linda exclaimed trying not to laugh again. Johnny gave her a murderous look as he raised his fist. "Try it buddy and I’ll kick you somewhere it’ll REALLY hurt!" she warned.

Johnny dropped his fist and looked down at his leg. "Well, what’s the diagnosis? Will I ever be able to play basketball again?" he joked.

"Yeah. I think you’ll be fine." the doctor responded. "Give it a week and you will be making those foul shots like you were a pro."

"Well, that’ll be a miracle since he never could before." Roy chimed in. Johnny turned and gave his partner a dirty look.

"Oh…I stuck them with Dixie. I think she has them penned in the lounge." Johnny responed.

"I had better go get them." Linda said as she slid off the table and turned to Johnny. "Do you want to drive me home?"

Johnny waved his hands out in front of him and gave her a wide eyed look of horror. "Noooooooo! Noooooooooo! You’re on your own sister!" he exclaimed. Linda giggled as she left the room.

Dr. Early looked at Johnny and Roy in confusion and asked, "Anybody want to fill me in on what’s going on here?"

"You really don’t want to known." Johnny answered as he slid off the table and headed for the door with Roy following him.

The two paramedics left the room as Dr. Early muttered to himself, "I should have known better than to ask."

The next day was a busy one for Station 51. There was a major six car pile up, a warehouse fire, two heart attacks, an electrocution, and a man who’s finger was almost amputated when it got caught in a fork lift chain. The crew came dragging into the community room. Roy went over to the coffee pot, looked inside and saw that it was empty. :"No coffee guys." He said as he started to prepare a new pot. His comment was met with groans and jeers.

"Can this day get any worse?" Johnny moaned as he dropped his head onto the table.

Chet looked at his watch andstated matter-of-factly, "Well, it’s four o’clock."

Captain Stanley looked at him in total confusion. "Very good Kelly. Now tomorrow we’ll work on your math skills." He commented sarcastically.

"My point exactly." Chet said as he got a "Don’t you get it?" look on his face.

Johnny raised his head and looked at Chet blankly as the other men looked on in bewilderment. "Chet, the only point I see is the one on top of your head." He commented in annoyance.

Chet rolled his eyes in frustration. "All I am saying is that it’s about time for the daily run to Johnny’s girlfriend’s house." He deadpanned as Johnny gave him a nasty look.

"Every day we’ve had at least one call to Linda’s house." Finished the Captain.

"Wanna bet it’s the little woman calling?" Chet jeered as Johnny got an annoyed look on his face. Roy laughed as Johnny waved his fist at Chet menacingly.

"1371 Sunnydale Rd!" chorused the entire staff of Station 51 with the exception of Johnny. Everyone looked at Johnny who tried desperately to avoid their gazed.

"Comedians! I’m surrounded by comedians!" he muttered as he jumped up and headed for the engine bay with the rest of the men following him.

"Maybe we should start giving out frequent flier points or something." Chet quipped.

"You know, I’ve been to Oakdale so much lately I can drive there in my sleep!" Roy exclaimed as he climbed into the driver’s seat.

Johnny looked at him out of the corner of his eye and sighed. "Those boys certainly DO require a lot of looking after."

Linda rushed over to meet the trucks as they pulled up in front of her house. The men got out and gathered around her.

"Inside. They’re locked inside my cedar chest." Linda explained with a hint of worry in her voice.

"About five minutes. Come on…I’ll show you." Linda headed for the house followed by the firemen. She led them upstairs to her bedroom. She pointed to a chest at the foot of her bed.

"They’re in there?! Johnny exclaimed in surprise as he set down the equipment and went over to examine the ches.

"You push the button…but it’s stuck. That thing’s over sixty years old and I guess the lock’s a little rusty." She informed him.

Johnny tried the button anyway without any luck. He shook his head and looked at Roy helplessly. "What do you think?" he asked.

"Guys, I wouldn’t care, except that chest was my grandmother’s and I’d prefer not to damage it." Linda said.

Johnny checked the front of the chest again and said, "Yeah…that might work." Johnny pulled his knife out of it’s sheath at his hip and flipped it open. He wedged the blade under the tip of the lid and poked it around. "Hey! I think I got it.!" He exclaimed. Roy pulled up on the lid and on Johnny’s final try the lid opened. Johnny closed the knife and slid it back into it’s holder then helped Roy pull the four conscious, but confused boys out of the chest.

"You guys had me scared to death!" she scolded. "What possessed you to do something so stupid?"

"We were trying to do an escape like the magician on TV did last night." Larry answered.

"Larry’s." Marty answered. "He said he knew how the trick was done and he could get us out."

"I told you this was a dumb idea! But would you listen? NOOOOOOO!" Chuckie exclaimed.

"Oh yeah! Right! Sure! Try again Chuckie!" Marty yelled. "You agreed with the whole idea!"

Johnny looked at Marty in utter disbelief. "You locked yourselves in a trunk based on the word of a seven year old?!" he asked incredulously.

Johnny looked at Marty and Chuckie and asked flatly, "You two boys aren’t very smart are you?"

"It means that as the two oldest you should’ve known better. That was dangerous and all of you could have been seriously hurt! Because the two of you followed the stupid idea of a seven year old, you almost killed yourselves and Andy!" Linda admonished.

Linda looked at the boy in annoyance as she answered. "You’re gonna get a full and loud explanation later. Go downstairs and wait for me in the kitchen. Sit at the table and DON’T move!!!!!"

Linda shoved the boys toward the door and true to form the kids started arguing with each other.

The noise of the children arguing slowly disappeared down the stairs. Linda sat down on the edge of the bed and dropped her head into her hands. "I don’t know how much more of this I can take." She sighed. "Every day it’s been something."

"Yeah, we know." Chet commented jokingly. "We know you like Johnny, but couldn’t you find a better way to see him?" he asked.

Linda looked at the group of men with a blank look on her face and asked innocently, "Hunh?"

Chet went to say something, but Captain Stanley elbowed him sharply in the ribs. Chet winced in pain.

"I only have one more week of this to go. Besides, their mother would prefer not to place them in the system." Linda explained.

"Kelly, how would you like latrine duty for the next month?" Captain Stanley growled.

"You gonna be all right?" Johnny asked concerned as he gently placed a hand on her arm.

Johnny squeezed her arm and gave her a reassuring smile. "All right then. Since everything’s okay we’re going to go now." He said.

Linda waved wearily as the men left. She then flopped down on the bed and buried her head under her pillow.

The full moon that appeared the previous night made for a busy day at the station the next day. There was the escaped patient from the mental ward at Rampart who tried to blow up the Federal Building with a gas can full of Kool Aide, the drugged out hippie who attempted to dry his hair in a clothes dryer causing him to become stuck, the teenage couple who locked their braces together while kissing, the woman who put her back out while disco dancing and the teenage boy who was the subject of a high speed car chase which ended when he finally crashed into the drive thru window of a local fast food restaurant causing multiple injuries. When the men fell into their bunks that night they were exhausted and soon fell asleep. When the tones sounded they were not met with enthusiasm although out of habit the crew rose quickly and jumped into their turn out gear.

"Tell me I’m dreaming." Chet moaned. "Better yet, tell me I’m having a nightmare and that I’ll wake up soon."

"Can’t we have just ONE day without seeing Linda and those kids?" grumbled Marco.

"Gage, you had better do something about that friend of yours before we all kill her!" Captain Stanley snapped.

"I’ve seen more of Linda in the past week than I have my own wife. I’m beginning to think I’m having an affair." Roy groused.

The men ran to the vehicles and proceeded to the fire. When they arrived they saw flames coming from the front windows of Linda’s house. Marty was safely sitting on a stone at the edge of the yard wrapped in a blanket. Captain Stanley quickly went to work ordering Chet and Marco to get an inch and a half hose while Mike got the pumps ready. Johnny and Roy went over to Marty kneeling down next to him.

Johnny and Roy looked toward the house and saw Linda coming out carrying Larry. Roy rushed over to her and took the child from her arms.

"The kids wouldn’t wake up, so I’m carrying them out." She shouted above the noise. Knowing that Larry was safe Linda turned back toward the house and disappeared inside.

"LINDA!!!" Roy yelled as he jogged over to Johnny. He laid Larry down on the ground. "Johnny, Linda went back inside!" he conveyed urgently.

Johnny got a terrified look on his face as he ran to the squad and grabbed his air tank. "Cap, there’s still people inside! I’m going in!" he advised as he put his gear on as fast as he could.

Johnny put his face mask on and ran into the house. Chet and Marco were on the porch trying to knock down the flames when they saw Johnny at the door. They directed the hose at him and saturated him with water as he ran into the house. The thick smoke clouded his vision, but having been there enough times Johnny was able to feel his way around accurately. He called out through his face mask, "LINDA!!! LINDA!!" He tripped on something as he headed for the stairs. When he knelt down he saw Linda on the floor with Chuckie a few inches away from her. Johnny picked Chuckie up and went to the door. "Chet, get Linda!" he ordered as he headed toward the front yard.

Chet dropped the hose and went into the house while Marco sprayed him with water. He found Linda at the foot of the stairs and after putting her over his shoulder, he carried her out of the house.

Roy looked up as Johnny approached with Chuckie in his arms and watched as he laid the boy down on the ground. Roy already had the oxygen equipment out of the squad. "These two are fine." He stated.

Johnny pulled his mask off just as Chet arrived with Linda. He laid her down on the ground next to Chuckie.

"Okay." Johnny looked at Roy. "I think these two just have smoke inhalation. I’m going back in for the baby." He said as he pulled on his face mask. Roy gave Linda and Chuckie each an oxygen mask then he called Rampart on the biophone as Johnny ran back to the house.

Marty looked at Roy with a very worried expression on his face. "Are they going to be okay?" he asked with concern as he looked at Linda and Chuckie.

Roy momentarily stopped taking vitals on Linda and Chuckie and looked at the frightened boy next to him. "Don’t worry. Andy’s going to be just fine too." He told the boy with an air of confidence he did not feel. Silently Roy prayed that Johnny would get to the toddler in time as he went back to work.

Johnny stumbled through the smoke to the second floor and over to the bed. He searched through the piles of blankets on the floor and on the bed. He found Andy curled up under a blanket sleeping He took off his air mask and then picked up the small child and placed the mask over his face as he left the room.

Linda regained consciousness and turned her head to look at the children next to her doing a mental head count. She sat up with a wide eyed look of terror on her face. "Andy!" she screamed as she pulled the oxygen mask off her face.

Roy turned his attention to her placing his hands on her shoulders. "Calm down." He ordered.

Roy pushed her back down. "Linda, it’s okay. Johnny’s getting him. Just lay down and relax." He tried to replace the oxygen mask on her face. Linda pushed it away.

"They’re fine." Roy reassured her as he put the oxygen mask back on her face again.

Johnny came out of the house with Andy and brought him over to the rest of the group laying him down next to Linda. Roy began to take the child’s vitals while Johnny put and oxygen mask over the boy’s nose..

"Yeah." Johnny coughed. "His being under the blankets probably saved him from inhaling too much smoke.."

Johnny started coughing again and Linda handed him her oxygen mask which he gratefully accepted. He took a couple of deep breaths from the mask and his coughing subsided.

Captain Stanley and Chet came over to the group. "Well, we got the fire out." The Captain stated.

Linda looked at the house in shock and disbelief. "How bad is it?" she asked with little emotion in her voice.

"What started the fire?" Linda asked as she turned her attention back to the Captain.

"We found these behind the couch." The Captain replied as he held out a small pair of burned underwear and a book of matches. Linda, Johnny and Roy all looked at the boys.

"Those were my favorite pair of underwear! Why would I burn my favorite underwear?!" Larry exclaimed.

Linda closed her eyes and began to whimper. Johnny put his arm around her shoulders and she buried her head against his chest. He looked over at the boys and just shook his head in disbelief. Suddenly Linda went from whimpering to laughing hysterically.

"Linda, what’s so funn?" he demanded to know as he pulled back and looked at her in surprise. Linda was laughing so hard she had a hard time speaking. Even the boys were beginning to get worried about her. Johnny grabbed her by the shoulders and shook her. "Hey! Hey! Stop!" he ordered. Linda continued to laugh hysterically as Johnny looked helplessly at Roy. "I think she’s lost it." He stated with worry in his voice.

"Well can you blame her?" Roy countered matter of factly. Johnny just gave Roy a comical "I guess you’ve got a point" look as he held Linda against him as Roy called Rampart with and update on Linda’s condition and to get permission to give her a tranquilizer.

Linda and Charlotte were sharing the same hospital room. Linda was sitting on the edge of her bed while Charlotte sat propped up by some pillows in her bed. Charlotte had a spacey look in her eyes and was acting very strange due to her medication.

""Johnny said that he and Roy might come to visit after work today." Linda informed her friend.

Linda gave her a harsh look of warning. "Char, don’t you DARE say anything to him! Your kids have embarrassed me enough. I don’t need your help."

"One word…hello…that’s it! You do anything else and I’ll make sure Officer Wray knows all about your TRUE feelings for him!" Linda teased as she gave Charlotte a sly grin.

Police officer Jeff Wray was Charlotte’s secret desire. The problem was that Charlotte was too shy to tell the guy how she felt. Linda used this knowledge to her advantage whenever she could.

There was a knock on the door. "You all decent in there?!" Johnny could be heard saying from the outside.

Linda called out to him. "Yeah! Come in!" Johnny and Roy came into the room wearing civilian clothes. Johnny was carrying a basket of flowers.

"Oh look!" exclaimed Charlotte excitedly. "He brought you flowers!" Johnny just casually glanced at Charlotte as Linda gave her an evil look.

"Yeah. The guys at the station all chipped in to buy this for you." Roy answered. "Read the card."

Johnny handed her the basket and Linda pulled out a card from the middle of the arrangement. She opened it and read aloud. "DON’T get well soon." Linda looked up at Johnny and Roy with a slightly puzzled look on her face. "Gee and I thought your friends liked me." She mused teasingly.

"Oh, they like you A LOT better not that you’re in the hospital!" Johnny teased back.

"So the secret to popularity is to have a nervous breakdown and to swallow smoke, hunh?" she asked jokingly.

"The squad developed a mind of it’s own today and we ended up driving past your house some how. That actually made the day complete." Johnny informed her.

"Hey! Are you going to introduce me, or do I have to GUESS which one is the stud muffin?!" Charlotte chimed in. Johnny glanced at Charlotte as Roy got an embarrassed look on his face. Linda just glared at her friend.

"Some loony they stuck me with." She responded. "no, really, this is Charlotte, the real mother of the Quarrelling Quartet. Charlotte this is Johnny and Roy." Linda pointed to each man respectively as she made the introductions.

"Hi!" Charlotte exclaimed a little too enthusiastically. She had a goofy smile on her face as she gave an exaggerated wave.

"And she is too. They just gave her a shot of Demerol. Ignore EVERYTHING she says." Linda advised.

Charlotte checked out every inch of Johnny. "Love those tight fitting jeans! Ummmmmm Hmmmmmmm!" she commented.

Linda turned beet red and Johnny became a little self conscious. Roy found the whole thing amusing.

"Um…what did you guys do with the kids?" Linda asked in an attempt to change the subject.

"We had a hard time finding anyone who would take all four boys out of the guys who worked last week." Johnny said.

"But there was one guy who was on vacation and we thought he would be the perfect match for them." Roy added.

Linda looked at Johnny with a confused look on her face. "Didn’t you tell me that he’s the anal retentive, by the book, Mr. Perfect Paramedic?" she asked incredulously.

Linda started to crack up with laughter. Charlotte joined in, although she did not know really why. Johnny and Roy stood there with comical looks on their faces.

"So what about you? Have you found a place to stay while your house is being repaired?" Johnny asked.

Linda shot Charlotte a murderous look and said, "Ignore her. My insurance company is going to pay for a hotel room until all the work is completed."

"Yeah. They’re being really good about the whole thing. Somehow I get the feeling my rates are going to sky rocket in the future though." Linda joked.

"Well, we should go. Call when you get released and I’ll help you move some of your things to the hotel." Johnny said as he gave Linda a friendly kiss on the cheek.

Johnny just looked at her as if she was from another planet as Roy tried not to laugh.

Johnny and Roy waved goodbye to the girls and left the room As they stepped out into the hallway they heard Charlotte yelling to them, "SEXY FIREMEN! WHOOOOOOOHOOOOO!!!"

This was followed by Linda’s voice, "Hello operator? Can you connect me with the LA Police Department? I need to speak with Officer Jeff Wray!"

The door slammed shut and the two paramedics looked at each other. Roy noticed that his partner’s face was beet red.

"Are you going to explain the "Sexy Firemen" thing to me? He asked with growing curiosity.

Johnny thought about that for a moment as he studied his partner. Then he shook his head and gave him a conspiratorial look. "No. Your STILL too young to know." He answered as he walked down the hallway. Roy watched his friend disappear around a corner He scratched his head in bewilderment as he tried to figure it out on his own.