Roy was sitting alone on the rear of the bumper of the squad when the engine backed into the bay returning from its last call. Chet, Marco, Mike and Captain Stanley dismounted the vehicle and headed for the community room.
"Don't go in there." Roy warned.
"Why not?" asked Chet
"Johnny's in there on the phone." Roy answered.
"So? I can't have a cup of coffee because Romeo's hustling a chick?' Chet inquired sarcastically.
"It's not just some girl he's trying to get a date with…its Linda." Roy informed him. "And he's really nervous about it."
It's about time he got smart and asked her out." stated Captain Stanley matter of factly.
"Oh this I've gotta hear." Chet said as he eased his way over to the closed door of the community room. Captain Stanley, Marco, and Roy all crowded around him as he slowly eased the door open slightly.
"Linda I wanted to know if you wanted to go out Friday night?" Johnny was heard asking nervously. "Out…you know on a date…yeah…a date…like where I pick you up and we get dressed up and we go out for dinner and maybe a movie or something…yes a real date...ofcourse I'd pay for everything."
"Linda must be really dense. observed Chet.
"Either that or the poor girl's in shock." added Marco.
"I hope Linda doesn't expect a fancy meal at a good restaurant." Roy stated sarcastically.
Captain Stanley and the others laughed slightly.
"Yeah, John Gage certainly isn't the last of the big time spenders is he?" asked Captain Stanley. "Remember how the twit only spent eight dollars and forty-two cents on dinner for his last date?"
"I hope Linda likes the all you can eat buffet." joked Chet.
Captain Stanley, Roy, Marco and Mike giggled a little too loudly at Chet's comment. Suddenly the door swung open hitting Chat on the side of the head.
"Ow!" screamed Chet as he backed away from the door.
"Maybe we should give him his privacy guys." Captain Stanley suggested as he motioned for the men to move away from the door.
"I think Gage needs to cut down on the caffeine some." muttered Chet.
"What's he so nervous about anyway? Marco asked slightly confused. "After all he knows this girl pretty well and it was kind of obvious that she liked him."
"Asking out someone you've know your whole life can be scarier than asking out a stranger. Trust me I know. When I first asked Joanne out on a real date I almost threw up." stated Roy.
"Who wants to bet Linda doesn't survive a date with Johnny?" asked Mike.
"I say he doesn't get a second date out of her." added Chet.
"I say Johnny ruins a beautiful friendship." Contributed Roy
"I think you're all underestimating Linda." stated Marco. "After all she knows Johnny pretty well and she likes him anyway. I think things will work out for them."
Chet reached into his pocket and pulled out a twenty-dollar bill.
" I have twenty bucks that says Johnny blows this date with Linda. Any takers?" he asked as he waved the money in the air.
"I'll take some of that action." stated Captain Stanley as he handed Chet twenty dollars.
Johnny came sauntering out into the engine bay with an ear to ear grin on his face. The grin disappeared as he saw the crowd gathered around Chet.
"What are you guys up to?" he asked suspiciously.
"Nothing!" stated Chet as he quickly hid the money behind his back.
The men all tried to look innocent as Johnny narrowed his eyes and studied each of them suspiciously.
"Nothing hunh? Then why do I get the feeling something is going on behind my back?" he inquired.
"Maybe because you're a paranoid schizophrenic? offered Chet as he slowly backed away from Johnny.
Johnny shot Chet a murderous look.
"So what did Linda have to say?" Roy asked in an effort to change the subject quickly.
The happy grin appeared on Johnny's face again, "She said she'd go out with me on Friday."
"That's great Gage!" cheered the Captain as he slapped Johnny soundly on the back. "Now maybe the rest of us can get some coffee without fear of wrecking your love life."
The Captain headed for the community room followed by Mike and Marco.
"You know Gage a sign that you've chosen the wrong girl is when you have to explain what a date is to her." sneered Chet.
"Yeah, well I look at it this way…I might get the chance to explain a lot of other things to her in graphic detail." countered Johnny with a wolfish grin.
Not having a comeback ready Chet quietly headed for the community room. Johnny turned to look at Roy who had a concerned look on his face.
"What's wrong with you? Linda and I are going out. You should look happy." stated Johnny.
"I was just thinking…you and Linda pick on each other just like you and Chet do."
"So? We're friends…friends do that."
"Yeah, but I'm wondering if it's possible for you two to go out together and not kill each other before the night is over."
Johnny shot Roy an annoyed look.
"Hey we joke around and pick on each other. Big deal. So what? I like it. It adds mystery and romance to the relationship." stated Johnny defensively.
Roy looked at him from the corner of his eye; "You're weird."
"Hey Linda doesn't seem to have a problem with it either. And she is the one going out with me."
"She's weird too. But maybe that's a good thing."
"What do you mean by that?!" inquired Johnny.
"Well if the two of you connect and date strictly each other that takes two strange people off the street and makes the world a safer place for the rest of us…ofcourse if you mate and have children then…" Roy shuddered at the thought. Johnny shot him a murderous look. He was just about to say something when the tones sounded.
"Squad 51 possible heart attack at 1211 Rosedale Road. One…two…one…one. Rosedale Road. Cross street Hamilton. Time out 14:45.
"KMG 365" confirmed Captain Stanley. He then handed the address to Roy who handed it to Johnny. Roy pulled the squad out of the bay and onto the street.
*************************************************************
Linda stood at the bathroom sink and brushed her teeth for the twelfth time that day. As she looked in the mirror she began to have second thoughts about going out with Johnny. Dating was not her strong suite and she knew she would do something wrong. Unfortunately it was too late to back out now so she had to force herself to face the inevitable. She rinsed the toothpaste from her mouth and stared at her reflection in the mirror. "What am I worried about? Johnny's a friend and we've gone out a lot of times as friends. That's what I'll do…I'll pretend this is just like any other time. No big deal." she thought to herself. The doorbell rang and Linda glanced at the clock on the wall. Johnny was right on time as usual. She wiped her face with a towel and headed for the stairs.
Johnny nervously waited on the front porch for the door to be opened. He brushed some imaginary lint off his sport coat and readjusted his tie for the hundredth time. Then he checked his reflection in the nearby front window and combed his fingers through his hair. Linda pulled the door open and Johnny was surprised to see her in a dress. He took a moment to appraise her from head to toe.
"Wow! You look terrific!" he commented in amazement as he handed her a dozen roses.
"Thanks." she replied as a wave of laughter rose out of her throat. "I wish I could say the same about you though!"
Johnny glanced down at himself in confusion as Linda burst out laughing. He did not see anything that was so amusing on or near his person.
"What?" he asked in confusion.
"I didn't know the circus was in town!" choked out Linda between laughing fits.
"Hunh?" Johnny inquired dumbly.
Linda was laughing so hard she could not speak and tears streamed down her face. She pointed at Johnny and the laughing intensified.
"Linda what is wrong with you?" Johnny demanded to know.
"Those pants!!!" Linda managed to gasp out as she sat down on the stairs and buried her head in her lap.
Johnny looked down at his black, tan and brown window framed patchwork pants he was wearing.
"What's wrong with em" he inquired innocently.
Linda looked up at him as she tried to keep control of her laughter.
"They look like rejects from the Salvation Army!" she said as another gale of laughter hit her.
"I'll have you know these things are the latest rage!" said Johnny defensively.
"Maybe for some poor refugee just immigrating to this country." Linda teased back.
She took a deep breath and tried to compose herself, as she looked Johnny squarely in the eye. "Okay, jokes over. On the way to dinner we're stopping by your place and you can change into something normal." she stated matter of factly.
"I'm not changing anything." Johnny informed her firmly. "I'm wearing these pants."
"You are not wearing those ugly pants out in public on a date with me! No how! No way!"
"Well we could always not go out." Johnny joked ruefully.
"Oh no! You promised me a real date and you're going to keep your promise. Just not in those pants!" Linda stated matter of factly as she stood up and headed out the door.
"I'm not changing!" Johnny called after her as he pulled the front door shut.
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Johnny turned the key and unlocked the apartment door. He wished he knew how Linda managed to talk him into things against his better judgment. One of these days he was going to find out her secret so he could defend himself against her and her dumb ideas.
He pushed the door open and motioned for Linda to enter.
"Welcome to my castle." he stated sarcastically.
Linda walked into the living room and stopped dead. The place was small, consisting of a living room/kitchen combination with a bedroom off to one side and a bathroom off to the other side. Linda scanned the entire area and could not believe what she saw. The beat up brown couch had stuffing showing through the cushions, the coffee table had one leg that was too short and being propped up by books. The top of the table was littered with take out food containers and plates, some with green stuff growing on it and papers cups. On the wall above the couch was a "Have a Nice Day" poster complete with Mr. Happy Face. The end table contained a Lava Lamp and a pile of newspapers.
On the floor in front of the couch was a florescent green throw rug shaped like a foot.
>From her vantage point Linda could tell the kitchen was in no better condition. Pots and pans and dishes were piled everywhere and the floor was in desperate need of being swept. Linda turned to her left and saw bookshelves made of cinder block and planks lining the only full wall the room had. The shelves were loaded with an eight-track player, a stereo with disco lights, a television set, records, tapes, music books, assorted nick knack's, and various other books. A guitar was leaning against the shelves and a Farrah Fawcett poster hung on the wall next to the shelves. The floor of the room was littered with dirty socks, underwear, uniforms, jeans, shirts and shoes. To her right Linda saw an old lounge chair which currently was serving the purpose of holding a pile of dirty towels and wash clothes. A pole lamp was located behind the chair and a uniform shirt and a pair of brief's hung off of the light.
Linda walked over and opened the small door on the left-hand side of the room. She quickly pulled it shut and looked at Johnny with a disgusted look on her face.
"I've seen gas station rest rooms in better condition than yours!" she stated sarcastically.
"Excuse the mess, but it's the maid's day off." Johnny offered in a halfhearted apology.
"What's her schedule?…the second Tuesday of every month with and "R" in it?" quipped Linda.
"As a matter of fact…yeah." Johnny answered seriously.
Linda shook her head in disbelief and opened the second door. She stared in stunned silence at the site before her.
"Oh groovy man!" she said sounding like a sarcastic hippie.
The bedroom closet was small with no door, but brightly colored strands of beads hanging from the frame. Inside the closet camping gear could be seen piled up on the floor and there were two sets of clean uniforms hanging on the rack above. Shoes and more clothes littered the floor. There was one window and it was covered with one sheet acting like a curtain. The main attraction of the room was the King sized waterbed which took up the rest of the space in the room offering little in the way of walking area. The bed was an unmade mess and in the middle of it was a pile of laundry. The sheets were cheap cotton blend with large orange carnations on them and they looked in serious need of washing and there was an old moth eaten army blanket mixed in with the mess. The pillowcases matched the sheets and also looked like soap and water had not touched them for a while. The headboard of the bed was solid oak and contained a mirror and six shelves. The shelves were packed with a clock radio, a rainbow coffee mug half full of coffee, odd change, a few more gaudy nick knack's, a mood ring and some small packets which Linda knew were not "Handy Wipe Towelettes."
"Well atleast you don't have a mirror on the ceiling." Linda sighed as she glanced at the dirty mirror in the headboard.
"Use to have one, but it fell down." quipped Johnny.
Linda looked at him and rolled her eyes in despair.
"So where's the pet rock?" she asked sarcastically.
"Oh it's around here somewhere. It gets shy and hides when company comes." Johnny joked as he began searching the contents of the headboard for the rock.
Linda pointed to the pile on the bed.
"Clean or dirty?"
Johnny glanced over his shoulder and studied the pile.
"Clean I think."
Linda mumbled to herself as she searched through the pile. Johnny gave up his search and watched Linda impatiently. Finally she settled on an appropriate outfit.
"Here…put these on." she stated as she handed him a pair of black jeans and a western shirt to match.
Johnny stared at the clothes in confusion.
"Don't you think these are a little too casual for a dinner date?" he inquired curiously.
"Where are we eating?" she asked.
"Bob's All You Can Eat Steak House." Johnny offered.
"That outfit is perfect." Linda said as she walked out of the room shutting the door behind her.
Johnny emerged from the room a few moments later wearing the new outfit and a pair of cowboy boots. Linda smiled when she saw how good the clothes looked on him.
"Much better." she commented.
"Let's go." Johnny stated tersely as he guided her toward the door.
********************************************************************************************
The evening was not going as well as Johnny had planned. First was the whole pants incident and then when they got to the restaurant there was a line that extended three blocks down the street. Not wanting to wait the couple decided to go to a disco tech for some dancing, but Johnny was denied entrance due to his clothes. Apparently the disco had Fashion Police on duty and if you did not look cool you did not get in. After the disco they tried the Movie Theater, but found no luck there either.
"I'm sorry the movie was sold out." Johnny apologized.
"No big deal. I really didn't want to see the "Exorcist" anyway." Linda stated point blankly.
Johnny knew that Linda hated horror movies and that is exactly why he picked that particular movie. It was his chance at a little revenge for the whole clothes bit and a chance to make a move, any move on Linda. Now that chance was gone and he was becoming disappointed. He was also quickly running out of options on how to entertain her.
"Hey…why don't we go bowling?" he suggested.
"It's Friday and on Friday's the NOW group holds their league games at the alley." Linda informed him.
"Forget it then." Johnny grumbled.
The last thing he needed tonight was to be the only man stuck in a room full of women who would love to do nothing more than rip him to shreds just because of his gender.
"Hey!" shouted Linda as she pointed out the windshield. "Let's go there!"
Johnny followed her finger and saw that she was indicating a pool hall.
"You want to go to a pool hall on our first date?!" he asked incredulously.
"Sure, why not? They have food there and we can always play a game or two. Come on it'll be fun!" Linda stated enthusiastically.
"Okay. Sure." agreed Johnny as he pulled the Land Rover into the parking lot of the establishment.
"No cheating this time though. We play by the rules alright?" Johnny warned as he eyed Linda suspiciously.
"Who? Me? Cheat?" Linda asked feigning innocence. "Why whatever do you mean? I don't cheat."
"I've never found a rule book yet that had the "any pocket" rule in it." Johnny informed her.
Linda laughed slightly; "Well I don't need to cheat. I'll beat you fair and square." she challenged.
"As I recall the last time we played you lost fifteen out of twenty games and that was with cheating."
"Yeah, well I won five out of twenty which means I beat you atleast five times. Besides I was drunk so all those games you won were by pure dumb luck!
"Well since you feel so confident how 'bout we make a little wager just to make it interesting?" suggested Johnny.
Linda eyed him suspiciously, "What kind of wager?" she inquired.
Johnny thinks for a moment before answering. "How 'bout loser has to clean the winners apartment." He flashes his classic crooked grin.
Linda laughs slightly. "Mighty confident aren't we pal?"
"I've seen you play pool. It's a sure bet."
Linda makes a face and sticks her tongue out at him causing Johnny to laugh. They get of the vehicle and head for the entrance of the pool hall.
The night was starting to look up for Johnny. He and Linda had a good meal of fried chicken, mashed potatoes and corn from the bar and now they were in the middle of their first game of pool. Johnny was ahead, but Linda was quickly catching up. He felt that they were both starting to relax and some of the dating pressure was finally easing up. He took a sip of his beer as he watched Linda make her shot. "Boy she does look good. "Maybe I should have made a different bet." he thought to himself as a sly grin crossed his face. Linda made her shot and did a goofy happy dance that caused Johnny to laugh. She lined up her second shot, but missed.
"Oh well, you're turn Minnesota Skinny." she teased as she set her cue against the table. "I'm going to the Ladies Room. No cheating while I'm gone."
"I swear." he states as he raised his right hand in a Boy Scout salute.
Linda headed for the rest room while Johnny studied the table and tried to line up his next shot. He was so intense on the game that he did not hear the front door of the establishment open. And he did not see the four large and mean looking bikers whom surrounded his table.
"This looks like a good table." stated one of the bikers.
"Yeah. Let's play here." agreed a second biker.
Johnny looked up to see the four large men looking at him with murderous looks.
"Beat it Stringbean." ordered one of the bikers. "This is our table."
Johnny pulled himself upright into his full height and glared at the bikers.
"I don't think so. I have this table and I'm not giving it up." he stated flatly.
"You don't have a choice in the matter." said the fourth biker. "When Python says he wants a table he gets the table."
Johnny quickly scanned the area. "There's atleast five other empty tables in this room. Use one of them."
"We like this one." stated the biker named Python. "Now are you going to move or do we have to move you Stringbean?"
Johnny held his pool cue tightly between his hands ready for battle. Linda came back from the rest room.
"Johnny…" she stopped short when she saw the bikers with Johnny. She did not need a PHD to tell her that trouble was brewing.
The bikers all turned their attention toward Linda. Johnny did not appreciate the leers that they were giving her and he quickly placed himself between her and the bikers.
"Well look at the dish Stringbean has here." leered Python. "Why don't you share some of that with us?"
"Leave the girl alone." growled Johnny between clenched teeth.
Linda looked around the room in the hopes of finding some help. There was no help to be found. She saw the bartender reaching under the bar and Linda assumed that he probably had a shotgun with a hair trigger under the bar.
"I'll tell you what Stringbean…we'll play you for the girl." Python offered conspiratorially.
"No." Johnny stated angrily. "You go anywhere near this girl and I'll kill you." he threatened.
"Hold it!!!!" exclaimed Linda as she stepped out from behind ohnny's protection.
Johnny looked over at her in shock and surprise.
"Linda stay out of this." he ordered.
"Let the chick speak." barked Python.
"I have a better idea." Linda persisted totally ignoring Johnny. "What if I bet you that I can make five pat hands out of twenty-one cards. Straight, Flushes and Full Houses count."
Johnny was beginning to think that Linda had drank something more than just Coke with dinner. Either she was drunk or had gone completely insane.
"What's the bet?" asked Python.
"If I can't do it you get to beat up my friend here and I'll go with you quietly…but if I can make the five pat hands you have to let us walk out of here in one piece."
Johnny had enough of this already. He grabbed Linda roughly by the upper arm, "Linda can I see you for a moment…in private?" he hissed.
He dragged Linda over to a dark corner a few feet away from the pool table. Johnny shoved Linda into the corner.
"Ow! Let go of my arm! You're cutting off the circulation." Linda whined as she wrenched her arm from his grasp.
Johnny leaned his left hand against the wall trapping Linda between him and the wall. Linda could tell by the look on his face that Johnny was not very happy. He was standing so close that Linda could smell the strong pungent scent of his aftershave.
"I could skin you alive." growled Johnny.
"What did I do wrong? " asked Linda in confusion.
"You're not helping the situation over there."
"Johnny take a good look at those guys. There is no way in the world you can take those guys on!" exclaimed Linda.
"So you decided to run a con game on them?" hissed Johnny.
"The bartender is ready to shoot somebody and you're ready to get beaten to a bloody pulp. And to top it all off Bubba wants me for his Love Slave. I'd prefer to use some brains to get out of this mess. That way no one gets hurt." answered Linda matter of factly.
Johnny gritted his teeth and looked down at the floor for a moment. Linda was right, even if she helped there was no way he could take on those gorillas. His pool skills were good, but he also knew those guys would cheat and he would lose Linda for sure. His male pride was taking a beating, but there was no other alternative. "Damned! She did it to me again!" he thought. He lifted his head and looked Linda directly in the eye.
"Are you sure you can do this trick?" he asked hesitantly.
"It's not a trick and yes I can do it." Linda answered with confidence.
"Alright." agreed Johnny with a defeated tone. "I'll trust you."
Johnny and Linda went over to the bar and bought a new deck of cards from the bartender. Then they headed back over to the pool table.
"So what do you boys say?" Linda asked.
"You've got a bet." answered Python.
"Okay, and to make it even more interesting I'll set a time limit." added Linda.
She turned to Johnny and held out her hand, "I need a quarter John."
Johnny had no idea what Linda was up to. She used his formal first name, which was a private code between them that indicated he was to go along with whatever she said. He reached into his pocket and pulled out some change. He handed her a quarter and replaced the rest of the change. Linda headed for the jukebox and deposited the quarter. The bikers all leered at her while Johnny dutifully kept his eye on both them and Linda his pool cue clasped firmly between his hands. Linda selected a song and headed back to the table.
"Now…I have to make all five hands, before the last note of the song ends." she stated.
Linda opened the deck of cards and began shuffling. When she was done she handed the deck to Python.
"Here…you deal."
"From the other side of the table if you don't mind." added Johnny with a threatening tone in his voice.
The bikers went around the table and stood opposite of Johnny and Linda. Python counted out twenty-one cards and tossed them to Linda. Johnny stood protectively by her side. The jukebox started playing Johnny Cash's "Burning Ring of Fire." Linda spread the cards out and bent over the table and went to work. The bikers kept their eyes on her as she fiddled with the cards. Johnny kept glancing from his opponents to Linda and back again. He was really beginning to regret his decision to let her do this stunt. After what seemed like an eternity Linda stood up and pointed to the table just as the song was ready to end.
"There you go gentlemen! Five pat hands!" she exclaimed proudly.
On the pool table lay one Full House, two Straights , one regular Flush and a Royal Flush. Johnny's eyes popped out of his head as he stared at the cards in amazement. Python and his men also stared at the cards.
"How'd you do that? inquired Python as he stared at Linda.
"Never mind how I did it. You just worry about keeping your end of the bargain. Now do we get to leave?"
"A deal's a deal."
"Good." Linda turned to Johnny. "Come on John. Let's go somewhere with a better class of people."
"You boys have a nice night now ya hear." Johnny said in a mock southern accent dripping with sarcasm. He laid his cue on the table and put his arm around Linda and they headed casually for the door. The bikers picked up the cards and tried to figure out how to do what Linda had done.
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Linda looked out the windshield at the deserted mountain road ahead. She could tell by the tense look on Johnny's face and the deafing silence that had wafted over to her from the driver's side that he was still angry with her. She also knew that the ride was not a romantic trip to some make out point, but a way for Johnny to blow off some steam.
"Johnny I'm sorry." she said apologetically.
Johnny glanced over at her with a cold look in his eyes.
"Sorry for what?"
"For whatever it is that I did to make you so mad at me."
"I don't want to talk about it" was his reply.
"Well I do." she said as she repositioned herself in her seat so she could face him.
"Alright…fine!" Johnny replied hotly. "Linda I'm a boy and you're a girl!"
"Well I'm glad to see they taught you basic Anatomy and Physiology in Paramedics training." quipped Linda.
Johnny shot her a murderous look. Linda was giggling slightly at her own joke, but the look stopped her cold.
"That's not what I meant!"
"Well what do you mean?"
"I mean that boys are suppose to protect girls! Not the other way around."
"Oh give me a break! You and I have been guarding each other's backs since First Grade. Since when did it become a crime for me to help you out?"
"Linda would it kill you to let me do the protecting just once?!"
"Johnny you're a real chauvinist pig sometimes! You know that?!"
"Yeah and you're too much of a Tomboy sometimes. Guys like to have a woman depend on them for things you know. Try it once."
"Johnny you know the home life I had and the situation I was brought up in. I learned at an early age how to deal with people like those Hells Angels rejects back there. I was taught to be a survivor and I don't know any other way!"
Linda turned to face the passenger side window. Johnny glanced over at her. She was right. He did know the type of life she had grown up with. Her parents were good people, but her dad liked to drink. Linda and her mother spent many nights sitting in bars while Don either drank or worked or both. Don would fiercely protect his daughter, but he also wanted to prepare her for the day when he would not be around to do so and as a result he taught Linda the fine art of how to be a boy and how not to trust people. That mistrust became even more ingrained in her after Don's death. Johnny never knew the full story as to why, but he knew that the situation itself left deep scars for all involved himself included. Tonight was just an example of Linda doing what she had to do in order to save herself and him from certain death.
"You're right. I'm sorry." Johnny apologized.
Linda turned to face him with a bewildered look on her face, "Hunh?"
"I was too hard on you. It's just that the girls I usually date aren't so…well they're nothing like you. That's for sure."
"I'll tell you what…the next time you get into a bar room brawl I'll sit in the corner and file my nails while chewing gum and cheer you on." she teased.
"Oh yeah…like that would ever happen!" laughed Johnny. Linda started to laugh also.
"A bunch of thugs and a crazy fireman all defending my honor! How groovy!" she said in a falsetto voice
Johnny started cracking up laughing at Linda's immitation.
"Cute. Real cute." he said as he reached over and pinched her cheek.
Johnny turned his attention back to the road just in time to see the man standing in his path. He swerved to miss hitting the pedestrian and came to a grinding halt on the soft shoulder. Linda braced herself against the dashboard as the vehicle lurched forward. Johnny slammed hard against the steering wheel. He looked over at Linda with concern etched in his face.
"You alright?" Johnny asked worriedly.
"Yeah…I think so." Linda answered breathlessly. "How 'bout you?"
Johnny sat back in his seat holding his hand on his ribs and wincing in pain,
"I'll be okay. Just some bruised ribs." He looks at Linda with a confused look on his face. "What the hell was that?!"
"I thought I saw a man."
"In the middle of a deserted road?!" Linda shrugged her shoulders and held her hands out helplessly.
"Hey! Are you all right in there?!" a voice in the dark asked.
Linda and Johnny looked at each other in bewilderment.
"I think I'm having auditory hallucinations." whispered Johnny.
"Yeah, well I'm hearing things too. Maybe we're dead and don't know it." Linda whispered in response.
Johnny shot her a comical look and just shook his head. A man appeared at the driver's side window startling Johnny and Linda.
"What the…!" started Johnny.
"I'm really sorry about that. Are you folks alright?" asked the man.
"Yeah. We're fine." answered Johnny.
"Was that you on the road?" Linda inquired.
"Yes. I've been hoping someone would come along who could help me." the man answered anxiously.
"What's the problem?" asked Johnny.
"My car broke down a few feet up from here and my wife is going into labor."
Johnny and Linda got out of the Land Rover and joined the stranger.
"Well you found the help you needed. I'm a LA County Paramedic. My name's John Gage and this is my girlfriend Linda Halloran." said Johnny as he showed the man his credentials.
"I'm Joe Nesbitt and my wife's name is Lisa."
"Alright Joe why don't you show us where she's at so I can have a ook at her."
"Sure."
Johnny and Linda followed Joe to his car that was parked fifty feet up the road from the Land Rover.
"When's your wife due?" Johnny asked.
"Not for another week. "
"Does your wife have any other medical problems?"
"No. None."
The group stopped at a dark blue sedan with steam spurting out from under the hood. Linda wondered off to check out the car's engine while Johnny stayed with Joe. A very pregnant Lisa Nesbitt was laying on the back seat moaning in pain. Joe climbed into the front seat and leaned over the back of the seat to talk to his wife.
"Lisa I found help. This is John Gage and he's a Paramedic. Now how's that for luck?!" Joe asked trying to sound cheerful and upbeat. "He and his girlfriend are going to help us."
Lisa just moaned in response. Johnny climbed into the back seat of the car and started to take Lisa's pulse. Linda returned from her inspection of the engine and leaned against the trunk of the car.
Johnny looked up at Joe with a questioning expression on his face. "How far apart are the contractions?"
"Um…about two minutes I guess." stated Joe. Just then Lisa let out a loud scream followed by a moan.
"Okay…Lisa…calm down…take some deep breaths…you're gonna be alright." He says soothingly as he puts his ear against her chest.
Johnny slid out of the car and looked at Linda.
"Well?"
"She's ready to deliver any minute now. Her pulse is strong and steady, but without my stethoscope I can't get an accurate reading on either hers or the baby's heart rate."
"I checked the car and it looks like the radiator and the water pump went."
"Well we have to get her out of that car. There's not enough room for me to work."
"May I make a suggestion?" asked Linda. earnestly.
"Yeah, go ahead." replied Johnny.
"Why don't we put her on the bed in the back of your truck. Atleast that would give you some more room to work and her a more comfortable place to lie." offered Linda.
Johnny gave Linda an approving look.
"That's a great idea!" he agreed.
"Thanks. Every once in awhile I get em you know."
A slight smile crossed Johnny's face as he looked at Linda.
"I'll get the Rover. You stay with Mrs. Nesbitt. Try to keep her calm."
"Okay."
Linda and Johnny had moved Lisa to the back of the Land Rover. Joe and Linda waited outside the vehicle as Johnny did a pelvic exam on the pregnant woman. Johnny emerged from the vehicle wiping his hands with a rag. Joe turned to look at Johnny with an anxious look on his face.
"My wife? How is she?" asked Joe with concern.
"We need to get her to a hospital." replied Johnny.
"What's wrong? Is something wrong with the baby?" Joe asked becoming more anxious.
"Not that I can tell. But I don't have any equipment with me in case of any complications. I'd feel better if we were at a hospital." Johnny answered calmly.
Johnny turned and looked at Linda.
"I need you to drive to Rampart." he said as he handed her his keys.
Linda took the keys hesitantly, "Johnny I can't drive a stick shift."
"I can." stated Joe.
Johnny glanced at Joe with a questioning look on his face, "Are you sure you feel up to driving?"
"It beats sitting there and worrying." commented Joe.
"Okay." said Johnny as he took the keys from Linda and handed them to Joe.
Joe took the keys and headed for the driver's side of the Land Rover. Linda looked at Johnny helplessly.
"I'm sorry." she said quietly.
"Don't worry about it. Listen I could use your help in the back anyway."
"Doing what?"
"There's something I didn't tell Joe…from what I can tell the baby's breech."
"Oh." Linda stated her voice dripping with worry. "That's why we need to get to the hospital."
"Yeah. We have to keep her calm and make sure she doesn't deliver that baby."
"What if we can't stop nature?"
Johnny looked at her with a worried expression on his face, "Then we've got a big problem."
Linda just nodded her head as the two head for the back of the Land Rover.
The ride to Rampart General seemed to take forever as Linda tried to keep Linda calm. Johnny continually monitored the woman's pulse and heart rate and kept track of the contractions. He felt totally helpless without his biophone and equipment. With each agonizing scream Joe became more anxious and almost crashed the Land Rover once as he turned around to see what was happening in the back.
Joe took the turn into Rampart's Emergency entrance on two wheels and screeched to a stop just outside the double doors. Johnny jumped out and ran into the hospital while Linda stayed with Lisa and Joe. Johnny returned with a gurney and an orderly. They transferred Lisa onto the gurney and whisked her into the hospital.
****************************************************************************************
Linda sat in the doctor's lounge nursing a cup of coffee. Johnny entered the room and Linda looked up at him questionably.
"Well?" she asked worriedly.
A big smile broke out on Johnny's face, "The baby and Lisa are doing just fine."
Linda let's out a breath she had not realized she was holding.
"And get this they named the baby after us."
Linda looked at Johnny totally confused.
"They named the baby John Linda?" she asked incredulously.
Johnny laughed as he sat down across from her.
"No silly. The baby's a boy. They named him Gage Halloran Nesbitt." Johnny stated proudly.
Johnny noticed the thoughtful look on Linda's face.
"What?" he asked worriedly.
"Oh…I was just wondering why your name is first." Linda stated wryly. "I think Halloran Gage Nesbitt sounds better."
"Gage Halloran Nesbitt has a better flow." he teased. "Besides it's only fair that I get top billing."
"Oh you think? And why is that? Because you're a guy?" Linda challenges.
"No. Because I was the professional on duty and you were my assistant."
Linda rolled her eyes and shakes her head in dismay.
"Sometimes Johnny Gage your logic astounds me." she stated dumbfoundly.
"You know everybody tells me that." Johnny stated with confusion in his voice.
Linda laughed slightly, "Can we go see the baby?"
"Sure." Johnny stood up and took Linda's hand as they headed for the door. "Maybe we could go back to my place and celebrate the new arrival of our name sake." he suggested hopefully.
Linda gave him a cockeyed look and started to laugh.
"I am not…and I repeat…not…going back to your swinging pad of groovyness. I may catch some disease there." she stated emphatically.
"Okay, how about your place then?" Johnny asked hopefully.
Linda started to reach for the door handle, but stopped midway and turned to look Johnny straight in the eye. He had a wolfish grin on his face and Linda tried not to laugh.
"Forget it buddy." she stated firmly. Johnny snapped his fingers and feigned a look of dismay. "Besides, I have every intention of finishing that pool game we started."
A shocked look crossed Johnny's face, "We're not going back to that pool hall are we?!"
"No. But I know another place with a pool table and cheap beer and definitely nicer patrons."
"Sounds good to me."
The couple exited the break room.
*****************************************************************************************
The door to the Y-Not saloon opened and the last strains of a Jerry Reed song drifted outside as Linda and Johnny emerged. The couple were laughing and talking as they walked down the sidewalk. Johnny had to admit that the night was getting better. He and Linda just spent the past four hours shooting pool, talking and dancing in the small smoke filled tavern. So far no other disasters had struck and Johnny finally began to see hope that his date would work out after all.
"I expect you at my apartment at 5:00 P.M. sharp tomorrow." Johnny teased.
"You didn't win! I did! That means you have to come to my house to clean!" argued Linda.
"Where did you get the crazy idea that you won?!" Johnny asked her incredulously. "I won twenty out of thirty-five games!"
Keeping pace with his stride Linda turned around and started walking backwards as she continued her conversation.
"You told me I couldn't use the any pocket rule right?"
"Yeah. So?"
"So you pulled the old "safety shot" rule in six of the games you won! Technically I won fifteen games and you only won fourteen games because six of the games were disqualified. Therefore you need to clean my house!"
"Linda safety shots are allowed in games. It's a real rule."
"Not when we play. If I can't call "any pocket" on the hard eight ball shots, then you can't just call a safety when you can't make em either." she concluded. "Therefore I win and you lose. Ha! Ha!"
Johnny was still trying to figure out her logic when he stopped walking and froze in place. His mouth dropped open and his eyes almost popped out of his head. Linda noticed the expression and stopped in her tracks also. She looked around and scanned the area in complete confusion.
"What's wrong?" Linda asked worriedly.
Johnny did not move or make a sound. He did not even blink. He just kept staring into space. Linda became worried and waved her hand in front of his face.
"Earth to Johnny! Come in Johnny!"
There is still no reaction so Linda grabbed him by the shoulders and shook him as hard as she could. "Johnny snap out of it! Alright fine! I'll come over and clean the pad of groovyness it you want! Just wake up and speak!"
Johnny finally blinked his eyes and Linda sighed with relief.
"It's about time you joined the rest of us in this galaxy. What happened to you?"
"My car!!!" Johnny cried with dismay in his voice.
"Your car?" Linda mumbled to herself as she looked up and down the sidewalk. "What about your car?"
Johnny had a surprised look on his face when he turned to face her. "It's not here!!! It should be here, but it's not!!!"
"Are you sure this is where we parked? Maybe we're further up or further down the street." Linda offered in an effort to calm him down.
"No I distinctly remember parking here in front of the telephone pole." Stated Johnny as he headed for the now empty parking space.
Linda watched in amusement as Johnny animatedly paced around the parking spot mumbling to himself.
"My car's been stolen! I can't believe this!" he grumbled to himself.
"What makes you think it was stolen?" Linda asked innocently.
Johnny looked at her as if she had three heads and six eyes. "A two ton vehicle just doesn't get up and drive away from a parking space by itself! Someone had to take it!" he answered with sarcasm dripping from his voice.
"So what are you doing? Looking for evidence or are you trying to do a Houdini and magically bring the Land Rover back by walking around and chanting?" Linda asked as a goofy smile broke out across her face and a laugh escaped her throat.
"I don't find this funny!" he stated angrily.
Linda tried to control herself, but found the situation and Johnny's reaction too funny. Johnny scanned the area again before he finally gave up in defeat. He dropped his head and his shoulders sagged as he tried to deal with the reality of the situation.
"What else could go wrong this evening?" Johnny moaned in despair.
The sound of thunder could be heard in the distance as lightening flashed in the sky causing Linda and Johnny to look skyward. Johnny squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head.
"Well let's see…it could rain…we could be mugged…a bus could run us over…" Linda offered in answer to his question.
"Linda it was a rhetorical question." Johnny sighed as he headed back to the sidewalk.
Linda kept going, "One of us could fall and break a leg…those bikers could find us and kill us…we'll probably get caught in a mud slide walking home…"
Large raindrops started to fall. Johnny grabbed Linda's arm and guided her to a nearby doorway.
"Then of course we have the natural disasters that could befall us…a hurricane could hit at any moment…or an earthquake could trap us and it would probably take days for anyone to find us…we could always get caught in a tornado…"
"Linda, shut up." Johnny stated as he cornered her in the doorway and leaned in and gave her a long passionate kiss on the lips.
At first Linda was taken aback by Johnny's actions, but the smell of his after shave and the secure feeling of his arms around her waist relaxed her and she soon found herself wrapping her arms around his neck and reciprocating the kiss. Johnny slowly moved his way from Linda's lips to kissing her neck. Linda opened her eyes and glanced over his shoulder. Suddenly she became very embarrassed and started turning six shades of red as she felt Johnny's hands move down her back.
"Johnny I know something else that could go wrong." she said quietly as she gently pushed his arms away.
"What?" he asked in a seductive voice.
"Your friend's could have bad timing." she stated flatly as she pointed toward the street.
Johnny stepped back slightly and studied Linda's face.
"Tell me you're kidding."
Linda shook her head slowly and continued to point. Johnny got a comical look on his face.
"Maybe if we ignore them they'll go away." he stated hopefully.
Suddenly the air was filled with cat calls, whistles, cheers, annoying kissing noises and a resounding sound of applause. Johnny felt the heat spread from his neck to the top of his head. Linda tried to stifle a nervous laugh. Johnny caught the silly look on her face.
"You would find this funny wouldn't you? Do you realize that I will never live this down?"
"Johnny is this going to happen every time we go out together?"
"Not if I can help it."
Johnny turned around slowly. The entire "A" shift crew was leaning against Chet's car which was parked in what was once Johnny's parking spot. Johnny glared at his friend's in annoyance.
"Will you guys knock it off before you get arrested for breaking the sound ordnance." he stated with impatience evident in his voice.
"At least we'd have company in the cell. You two are on the verge of being arrested for indecent exposure." Captain Stanley quipped.
Johnny took Linda's hand and the two headed over to the group of firemen.
"Don't you all have wives and families to go home to or something?" asked Johnny.
"Tonight is some kind of PTA sleep over night, so all us old married men are baching it while the women and children are out of the house." Roy offered in explanation.
"So what…you've been following me around on my date?"
"No. We were having a poker game over at Chet's and we needed to go on a beer run." said Mike Stoker.
"Although judging by the eye full we just got following you could be more fun." added Chet.
"So how's it going Linda?" asked Captain Stanley.
"Oh…it's going fine." Linda answered quietly.
A thought crossed Johnny's mind and he eyed Chet suspiciously.
"Hey! How'd you know we were here?" Johnny inquired.
"Uh…we saw your truck." answered Chet nervously.
"My truck's not here so how could you have seen it?"
Johnny rested his hands on his hips and scanned the faces of his co-workers. Linda was becoming suspicious also and she looked from Johnny to the rest of the men and back to Johnny again.
"Yeah…how did you know we were here?" she inquired.
""Um….welll…"started Roy.
"Yeah…you see we um…Chet you better tell him." ordered Captain Stanley.
"Tell me what?" Johnny demanded angrily as he gave Chet a murderous look.
Johnny slowly walked toward the smaller fireman. Chet backed away from him only to find himself blocked from behind by his car and in the front by Johnny.
"What did you do to my car?!" Johnny demanded to know.
Chet laughs nervously, "You're going to laugh when I tell you this."
"CHET!!" shouted Johnny.
"Okay! I had the truck towed around the corner so you wouldn't find it.!" Chet spits out quickly.
Johnny's eye brows shot up as he glared angrily at Chet. Linda joined Johnny.
"You what?!" she stated in shock.
"Actually it was quite funny." Captain Stanley commented.
"You should have seen your face when you came out and found your truck gone." laughed Roy.
"I wish I had my movie camera with me! I'd love to have you freaking out all over the place on film." chuckled Chet.
Johnny made a fist and waved it under Chet's nose.
"With the evening we've been having we didn't need this!" stated Johnny flatly.
"Date not going well?" Chet asked hopefully.
"The date's going fine." answered Johnny flatly.
"If you don't mind your boyfriend showing up on your doorstep in clown pants and then having to spend an hour poking around his roach infested pad of groovyness trying to find appropriate clothes…." started Linda.
"Pad of groovyness?" repeated Captain Stanley as he looked at Roy helplessly. Roy just shrugged his shoulders.
"It's not roach infested!" countered Johnny defensively.
"I want to know about the clown pants." added Chet.
"Ofcourse then there were the bikers who wanted to kill Johnny and make me their love slave, and then there was the near accident we had, and delivering the baby in the back of the truck and then getting rained on and finally being spied on by your boyfriend's friends. All in all I'd say the date was a rounding success." concluded Linda matter of factly.
Chet, Captain Stanley, Roy, Marco and Mike looked at each other in utter disbelief.
"If all your first dates are this bad it's no wonder you don't get many second dates. Junior." Roy stated wryly.
Johnny shot Roy a murderous look. "Some best friend you are!"
"Linda you used the word boyfriend twice…does that mean that you're going to keep dating this nut?" Chet asked incredulously as he jerked his thumb toward Johnny.
Johnny along with the entire "A" shift waited with bated breath for her answer. Linda thought about the question before answering. She looked at Johnny and smiled.
"If he asks then, yeah. I'd go out with him again."
"Why?" asked an astounded and confused Chet.
Johnny flashed his classic crooked grin.
"Really?!" he asked in surprise.
Linda nodded her head and smiled as Johnny slipped his arm around her waist. Marco broke out into an ear to ear grin and held out his hand as Chet begrudgingly handed over a wad of cash to him. Johnny caught the transaction and the dismayed looks of his fellow co-workers.
"What's that all about?" Johnny inquired.
"Nothing. I just owed Marco some money." stated Chet matter of factly.
Johnny's eyes narrowed as he looked to Roy for help.
"Roy?" he asked suspiciously.
Roy tried to avoid his friend's gaze, "Well you see we had this bet…"
Johnny's eyes popped out of his head as he glared at his friends.
"A bet?!!!!" Suddenly a thought hit him, "So that's what was going on earlier this week!"
"I never doubted you for a moment Gage." stated Marco.
Johnny just looked at Marco and rolled his eyes.
"Say guys since were all here in front of a bar and Marco has some cash now, what do you say we all go inside and have a few to celebrate Johnny finally getting a second date?" suggested Chet as Johnny gave him a murderous look.
"Sounds good to me, but I think we should celebrate Linda's surviving her first date with Johnny." laughed Captain Stanley.
"I'll drink to that." agreed Roy as he headed for the bar with the rest of the crew.
Linda watched as the men went into the bar. Once they were out of sight she turned to look at Johnny.
"Uh…shouldn't we go in there with them?" she asked as Johnny stood silently with a thoughtful expression on his face.
"Personally I'd rather go back to the doorway and pick up where we left off." he answered honestly.
Linda laughed slightly, "We still could do that you know." she teased
"Nah! They'd only find us again."
"So what are you cooking up in that head of yours John Gage?"
"A way to get even."
"Some how I don't think that's going to be too easy to do. Chet got us good."
A sly smile spread across Johnny's lips as he looked at Linda.
"What?" Linda asked with puzzlement in her voice.
"I know how I can teach all those guys a lesson!" he exclaimed proudly.
"How?"
"That card trick of yours. How many times can you pull it off successfully?"
"Fifty out of fifty times. And it's not a trick. It's an actual game called Maverick Solitaire."
"Whatever. Anyway your little con game is going to win me some sweet revenge." he gloated as he drapped his arm around her shoulder.
A sly smile crossed Linda's face. "You're bad!" she laughed.
"Yeah. I know." Johnny said as he flashed his classic crooked grin. "And that's why you like me so much." He tweaked her nose playfully.
Linda rolled her eyes and laughed. "Johnny you're a nutburger! A real nutburger. Come on let's go skin a few rats so we can finish our date in peace."
"So would that be your place or mine when we're done here?" he asked coyly.
"I am not going back to the psychedelic pad of grooviness!"
Johnny laughed. "Your place then." he stated hopefully.
"How about we take this one step at a time and just see what happens okay?"
"I'm gonna keep trying you know." A sly grin crossed Johnny's face as he leaned over and kissed her on the lips. When he finally came up for air Linda had a stupid happy grin on her face.
"This could be fun!" Linda thought to herself as the couple headed for the door of the bar.
